L and S

I can guess how much poop is in an infant size ostomy bag before I even have to suck it out with a syringe.  Do you think I could put that on my resume somewhere?  These last few months have been a surreal experience and I cannot WAIT to tell you all about it. 

So in May Andy and I started talking about maybe trying to get pregnant again.  We were thinking we would try in July so that the timing would be ideal for my work season.  No sooner had we uttered the words, "maybe" and "baby" when God decided, "NOW."  June 8th I discovered I was pregnant.  June 21 I discovered I was pregnant with twins.  September 3rd I discovered I was pregnant with twin boys.  Every day in between I was sick.  October 22nd I was admitted to Mother-Baby in Abbott for pre-term labor.  I was 23 weeks pregnant and I stayed in the hospital for a week on a lot of IV anti-labor medication.  I went home at 24 weeks and sat on my butt for 2 weeks.  At 26 weeks exactly, I walked from the basement to the kitchen, did a couple dishes, and walked back downstairs.  The doctor that discharged me insisted that this would be fine as new studies proved true bed-rest to be less successful as previously determined.  I knew better.  My friend from church drove me back to the hospital where I was taken by ambulance to Abbott Northwestern, the only NICU to care for infants born between 23 and 32 weeks.  I sat for 3 days in the hospital on more medicine and on November 13th the same doctor that discharged me the first time was rounding, so I told Andy to pack my bags.  Sure enough Dr Wagner came by and said to start thinking about discharge and he wanted to pull me off all anti-labor meds as I was having some mild side effects.  Not even an hour after he stopped my Nifedipine, I began contracting again and within an hour of that the emergency C-Section was ordered by none other than Dr Wagner himself.  Andy had the day off so he and Charlie had been in my room spending a little time with me before I came home.  I had a remote attached to my bed with power controls for the drapes on my window.  Andy had convinced Charlie earlier in the visit that Charlie could control the movement of the drapes with a certain voice command.  Charles loves the show, "Jake and the Neverland Pirates," so Andy told Charlie if he stood facing the drapes and yelled, "AHOY!" they would go up and down- all while Andy was pushing the remote buttons.  I watched the power of Charlie's voice command and Andy's manipulation go straight to both their heads and it proved an entertaining mix-up for my otherwise boring day.  Everything changed when the C-Section was ordered.  You would think with all the pre-term labor I experienced I would've expected to probably deliver early, but I couldn't believe it was happening.  I knew the odds of survival, never mind living a normal life were rough for babies born as early as mine would be.  Labor nurses were scurrying, Doctor Wagner was checking my progress every few minutes to make sure I wasn't going to deliver two upside-down babies my own way.  The TV was still on and Stephen A and Skip Bayless were going at it, and I was in some of the worst pain I've ever felt.  Andy was on the phone with close family letting them know what was happening and finding someone to take Charlie for the night.  With the chaos, I feared all this was too much to take in for a 3 year old and I looked for Charlie around the room.  My eyes found him in a fit of frustration standing over at the window.  "AHOY!   I SAID AHOY!  DADDY IT'S BROKEN!  AHOY!"  Okay so he was fine.

The twins were delivered in a whirlwind and the C-Section is something I'll never forget.  You ladies who have had those really had me thinking it was rather easy... not so much.  They were yanked out, yes YANKED, and then they both cried for a moment before being whisked away to a waiting team of Neonatalogists.

Two months later both boys are over five pounds and doing far better than I ever could've prayed for.  Churches across the country put us on their prayer lists, church family stepped up and provided meals and childcare for Charlie.  Family and friends came from afar to help in any way they could.  Entire communities gave in encouragement and support and God provided.  Lucas Andrew and Sawyer Rodney will see, hear, smell, taste, grow, run, laugh, and love for as long a life as God gives them like any other little boys.

The boys are still in the hospital but will hopefully go home in a couple weeks and boy are we ready.  The commute to downtown Minneapolis and back, sometimes several times a day is consuming and my heart hurts every time I pull away from Abbott with empty car seats in my back seat.  I realize we aren't going to come up with any more time when they come home, but at least they'll be home.

Soooooooooo- I guess all this means I will have a lot more to blog about.  I'm fairly certain three little boys won't disappoint for some good stories and lessons learned. 

Bra Straps and Piddly Problems

Once upon a time there was a happy, healthy, energetic girl inside of me. 
Once upon a time my skin glowed from the sun and my 6 hours of sleep was plenty. 
Once upon a time I'd throw on shorts and tank and walk to the lake with my little boy.
Once upon a time my house was clean and my hair was done nicely.

Once upon a time I didn't pee my pants on a daily basis.
Once upon a time .....

Andy and I had talked about the possibility of another child before my son got too old, we liked a gap but didn't want it too big.  No sooner had we tossed the idea around in a prayer or two when I got the hunch and took a test.  Positive.  I shared my news with Andy in a very carefully-laid out performance and he was overjoyed, as was I.  This is obviously what God wanted! 

Two weeks later Andy left for Las Vegas with a friend while I got hit the night before by the morning sickness truck.  I was tired, sick, and not looking forward to a week alone when I decided to go the doctor and ask for the medicine they'd given me last pregnancy to help retain some of what I ate.  Andy was still on the plane when the doctor ordered an ultrasound to check dates and look into a small concern he'd noticed in my abdominal exam.  The tech was taking her sweet little time telling me what was going on and 20 minutes into my ultrasound I finally asked if she could see my baby and whether or not she could verify my dates for what my due date would be.  She hesitated for about 5 seconds, which was more than enough time for me to think about each and every terrible thing that could be wrong with my little one...twice.  She finally clicked one last click on the keyboard and looked at me with an expression I couldn't read.  I blurted out, "Well can you see my baby?!"  She slowly replied, "Well, honey, do twins run in your family?"  This marked the first of many episodes where I peed my...well...gown in this case.

Since my six week ultrasound I've come to accept a lifestyle I never in a  million gazillion trillion poopillion years expected.  For one, I was popping out of my pants and shirts two weeks later at just 8 little weekers.  My bras started making it nearly impossible to breathe, and it's always fun to walk into a bank with an unsnapped bra up at my chin- I ALWAYS remember to unsnap them in private, but not always to RE-SNAP them.  My poor husband and close friends have gotten real used to this oversight. 

Another big adjustment I've made, and it still surprises me how easily I've desensitized myself to this- I get peed on A LOT.  Let me explain.  Andy just potty trained Charlie and let's just go ahead and call him a dripper.  Without fail,  he pees on me every single time I help put his undies back on after going potty 497 times between getting home from daycare and bedtime.  It doesn't phase me, I wipe it on whatever is closest and move on without flinching.  Then there's me, I pee a little every time I sit down, every time I yawn, every time I sneeze, every time I cough, walk down steps, or slam on the brakes.  It's gotten to where I bring extra pants everywhere I go, which is tough when I only have 3 pair that will embrace my new body. 

Pregnant with multiples, Angelina Jolie has done it and if the tabloids are correct, she's doing it again.  M Carey did it.  They all bounce right back and look so chic while doing it. Not this whale.  No way.